Perceptions Create Beliefs
I want to help you understand how our perceptions become beliefs, and how our beliefs change as our perceptions change.
Here's a story....
Mom has twin girls. (If it helps you, you can have a dad or boys or any combination that helps you relate to this story.)
Twin A and twin B run up to mom and beg for her to read them the new book they got for a present. Mom says, "No, not right now. Go outside and play for a bit. Mommy is busy and just can't do that right now."
The twins do not know that mom just discovered that they don't have the money they need in their bank account to cover the electric bill. Or maybe mom just had an argument with dad. Whatever the situation, they don't know why mom is short with them and sending them outside. They just know mom is tense and wants them to go outside.
Twin A notices mom seems upset and runs over and gives mom a hug, tells mom she loves her, and runs outside to play.
Twin B notices she feels sad inside. She is upset that mom is "too busy" to read her a book. She doesn't understand why she isn't important. Twin B hangs her head, drops the book, and slowly walks outside.
Are you seeing this picture? Do you see how two people can experience the EXACT same thing BUT internalize it two different ways?
Twins have different perceptions
One child doesn't come to the conclusion that she is not important when mom says to go outside, but instead senses that mom has a need and gives her a hug. Her self esteem isn't affected at all. The other child takes it personally and allows this memory to be stored as a message that she is not important.
But, I was wronged!
There are times that children and people ARE treated in a way that they should not be treated. There is no doubt that parents and other human beings do things and say things they should never say or do. BUT, that does NOT mean that we need to hold on to those memories and allow our subconscious to send stressful messages to mess up the rest of our lives due to what other people have said or done. (Or even because of something WE have said or done in the past.)
We have to let go of who is right and who is wrong in situations. In the example above, for instance, everyone is correct! Mom really does feel what she feels, she feels the need to be alone. At that moment giving the kids attention was not as important as what she was feeling. Mom had needs and it is acceptable for her to take care of herself so that she has the emotional reserves to care for her family. Child A was correct to feel like giving mom a hug and obeying her by going outside to play. Child B was correct in feeling she wasn't important, it was correct for her to feel sad that she wasn't important enough for mom to read to her right then.
What about abuse?
Let's say that someone has a memory of being abused. How can everyone be correct in that situation? The abuse is totally unacceptable, I agree. BUT, in the abuser's mind, in the abuser's perception from all the experiences in the abuser's past, what the abuser did was acceptable. The abuser has a bad program running in their head and needs a lot of help. The abuser is hurting inside, and that hurt has driven the abuser to doing unacceptable things. We can't change what the abuser has done, but we can come to a place of accepting that the abuse is now in the past and playing that bad memory, as if it is our favorite movie, only damages our life until we change the disc.
It doesn't have to be a childhood memory
The example above is about children, but our brain continually collects our perceptions about all the events in our lives. It may be how someone treated you at work. It may be arguments you have had with your spouse. Two people can have the same cashier at the store. One may come away with the perception that the cashier was rude, because they hold memories from their past that people don't treat them well. The other person may come away with the perception that the cashier was tired, because they remember when they were a cashier and how tiring it was to stand all day waiting on impatient customers.
Faster EFT works!
Using the Faster EFT method, we go back into the subconscious and change how it represents the past, so that it doesn't send hurtful messages that cause you to feel things that are no longer true. We "scratch" the disc so that the negative stuff doesn't play anymore. Then we replace the negative message with a positive message so that your brain readily recalls something positive instead.
What About Pain?
Did you know that even pain is something created by your emotional response to memories? Yes, many people find relief by using the FEFT belief system. I say, "using the FEFT belief system" because it isn't just tapping on certain points that works. THAT is the BIG mistake people make when using methods that use tapping. They start tapping to avoid the pain, but it is the whole mind/body work that changes what is going on inside.
Watch the video at the bottom of this page to hear Robert G Smith, the founder of FEFT, explain about ending your pain with FEFT. (Most need to work with a practitioner to get to the root and change what's going on.)